I’m Not Angry

The day was a good day. Then the alarm went off. Have your ever had one of these days? I know that all of us have at some point in time. It happens to me all the time. For no good reason, you wake up and you are just in a bad mood. There is no reason for that at all. The only way that find that I can get out of this type of situation is to find a place to be alone and pray. It is so hard to do sometimes. Take the times when you are awakened by your wonderful children, or your wife. I have plenty of these moments to where I am asked to just get up and go. My fellow brothers-in-arms understand this, you are called to move, you move. That still doesn’t change your mood though. It is hard to shut that off. For me, this feeling of anger can last for hours if I am not doing something that I want to do. Isn’t that funny? I am angry when I am not doing what I want to do… sleep, in this case. I forget, in this moment, that the things that I am being called to do are not for me, they are in service to someone else. I should be grateful that I have people that depend on me for this. Just like God asking me to do something, I should be just doing this… and not angry about it, but grateful. I spend all that time being angry, for what reason? If this is what I am called to do, then why am I so upset? I think that is why we miss our calling half the time. We are spending so much time walking around angry. Angry about what we have. Angry about what we don’t have. Angry about what the neighbors have, or don’t have, or whatever. We, in reality, should be just happy with what we have, and happy that we are on a path. If we take the time to listen, then we will realize that we are truly blessed in the moment. If you can realize that you are angry in the moment, and try to not be. It is really hard for me to figure out. I am sure I am not alone in this. The angry can be all consuming, and cloud the fact that I really don’t have to be. It sure would be nice to have an off switch for this. Still, there are some times, when I can find that moment to be alone and pray. When I can, I find that slows me down, gets me back into scope, and a little less angry. It allows me to open myself up to God, and to let him take the burden away. It helps to melt the mood away, and helps me to see that I am there for a reason. I don’t have a need to be angry, if I am giving the moods up to God.

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